DRUNK REVIEW/RANT: Finale by Stephanie Garber


Finale by Stephanie Garber

Reviewed by Sam!


Welcome, welcome to Finale, the third and final book in the #1 New York Times bestselling Caraval series!

Welcome, welcome to Caraval…all games must come to an end.

It’s been two months since the last Caraval concluded, two months since the Fates have been freed from an enchanted deck of cards, two months since Tella has seen Legend, and two months since Legend claimed the empire’s throne as his own. Now, Legend is preparing for his official coronation and Tella is determined to stop it. She believes her own mother, who still remains in an enchanted sleep, is the rightful heir to the throne.

Meanwhile, Scarlett has started a game of her own. She’s challenged Julian and her former fiancé, Count Nicolas d’Arcy, to a competition where the winner will receive her hand in marriage. Finaly, Scarlett feels as if she is in complete control over her life and future. She is unaware that her mother’s past has put her in the greatest danger of all.

Caraval is over, but perhaps the greatest game of all has begun―with lives, empires, and hearts all at stake. There are no spectators this time: only those who will win…and those who will lose everything. . .

Synopsis from Goodreads

What I drank prior: So so much vodka. I had A DAY. But it was made better by Ginny and her bff Liz and now I’m drunk. Probably had 8-10 shots worth of vodka here.

Spoiler-free Overview: this is a series finale (get it?) so if you don’t know what’s going on… that’s a you problem? We’ve got reviews for Caraval and Legendary But basically our two main ladies Tella and Scarlett are tryna save the world from the Fates. They’ve got a mama who’s still asleep? And each have their own two men to deal with.

Spoiler-free Thoughts: Guys this book was trash lol. I’m sorry to be so blunt but it wasn’t just bad it was horrendous. I’ll get into it more below, but this felt like Garber had an idea of how she wanted it to end but zero fucking clue how to get there. Plus also the BOYZ.

Characters: ok. This book did not pass the Bechdel Test. Literally at one point, the sisters experience a significant loss, and instead of talking about it, they talk about their upcoming dates. Come on… we’ve spent two books developing these seemingly badass characters to be given that?! Whatever. Here they are and what I think about them:

  • Tella: in love with two immortals and oh em gee let’s force them to love me.
  • Scarlett: oh em gee let’s start a courtship war between real-duke and Julien. But also let’s not care about the fact that you already know what’s going to happen, your pride is just in the way.
  • Julien: he’s the only one in this book that doesn’t suck. Except maybe his wildly problematic issues with “protecting the women”
  • Jacks: also THE WORST. I get it, he’s a Fate but like… why does he still matter
  • Dante/Legend: the actual worst. He’s abusive ad a tease and I want him to go away.
  • Nicholas: I feel like he was supposed to get a more well rounded story but that bit was cut. Who is he? Why does he matter? I’m done with this book and I still don’t know.

Plot/Writing Style/World Building: (I have a lot of jumbled thoughts ok?) We get not one but TWO love triangles here people. STOP THE PRESSES! It seemed all over the place. There were parts of the plot I needed more in order to buy in, and others where I was like “ok, we know this alreadybwhy are you wasting words?” I know I have an ARC but… it needs so much more editing. The Fates add an extra layer of magic, I know, but there were some things that seemed way out of the realm of this world. But, again, she had an end in mind and forced a way into it.

I know I’m probably going to get a lot of hate with this but I have so many other spoilery thoughts. If you’re interested comment below and I can give you ALL the examples of how this book sucked.

What to pair it with: Natty Lite. The shittiest shit beer ever.

Rating: 1/5 Shots


Until next time, we remain forever drunkenly yours,

5 thoughts on “DRUNK REVIEW/RANT: Finale by Stephanie Garber

  1. What to pair it with: Natty Lite. The shittiest shit beer ever.

    Sam I am literally laughing so hard right now that my side has a stitch. While I definitely didn’t hate this book like you did, I actually do agree with the Bechtdel test issues and honestly? I felt that this one should have been a story about Tella and Scarlett but it was more Tella focused with her love triangle (and I am sorry to say that I know Jacks is an asshole but I love him and I know it is problematic but there you go). Scarlett was barely in this book and I don’t even remember who the fuck Nicholas was. Was the the penpal fiance?

    My issue with the book honestly was the loose threads. a lot was resolved but there are a bunch of things from the first two books that I didn’t get worldbuilding explanations for (I have a spoiler list in my review) and it kind of makes me sad. ALSO the ending with Jacks just disappearing??? Like how tf is that an ending? He wouldn’t just go away and he deserved better. And WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT TRADING HER FUTURE DAUGHTER’S WEAKNESS?!?!?!! Like am I the only person really pissed off at that plot thing that added nothing to the story but a gaping hole of resolution?

    And the ending felt fucking rushed.

    Honestly, thank you. You’re the first negative review I’ve seen. I still liked the book a lot but no one is talking about how imperfect it is and it annoyed me.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Kaleena…. this book was so bad. Someone needed to say it and Drunk Sam gives no fucks and had that privilege.
      Jacks is charming, I suppose… but he’s also controlling and sorta abusive… so it’s hard to get past that.
      SCARLETT turned out so damn boring. You’re totally right. Nicholas was the pen pal guy that, once she chose Julien, immediately died.. so.
      I didn’t even get to the loose threads, you’re totally and completely right. There were entirely too many unanswered questions. Especially trading weaknesses but also… where did the fates GO?!
      Ugh. I know this series is well loved but damn… can we at least talk about how your mom died for like 3 pages before we talk about the dates? Can we not force men to love us? Can we just please, for the love of all things holy, have a female author pass the damn Bechdel Test?!?!?

      I’m glad Drunk Sam could give you a laugh?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Honestly I hate myself for liking Jacks so much because he is abusive and I HATE the romantization of abuse in YA fiction. But then again he just pulls at my morally gray heartstings! I just wanted better for him and the “ending” he got was bullshit.

        Yea the whole “the fates just decided to obey the status quo” wasn’t a wrapup at all lmao. The whole true ending chapter was a huge disappointment to me, I almost wish those 4 pages weren’t included, I would have been less angry.

        Liked by 1 person

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