DRUNK REVIEW: The Perfect Nanny by Leila Slimani

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The Perfect Nanny by Leila Slimani

What I drank: I went to a birthday beer pong tournament for a 40 year old man, in which PLOT TWIST I did NOT play, but DID drink vodka sodas…and pinot…and shots. And I’m still so so alive. I’ve conquered drinking.

Synopsis, from Goodreads: When Myriam, a mother and brilliant French-Moroccan lawyer, decides to return to work, she and her husband are forced to look for a caretaker for their two young children. They are thrilled to find Louise: the perfect nanny right from the start. Louise sings to the children, cleans the family’s beautiful apartment in Paris’s upscale tenth arrondissement, stays late whenever asked, and hosts enviable kiddie parties. But as the couple and the nanny become more dependent on each other, jealousy, resentment, and frustrations mount, shattering the idyllic tableau.

Non spoiler thoughts: I was signed up for something in the Gone Girl vein that’s gotten so popular, and was just so unfulfilled. The story literally opens with the death of the children and the arrest of the nanny, so my expectation was like buildup in flashbacks alternating with present day post-arrest. We get wildly little of the post-arrest time, and a TON of buildup…and that’s it. It’s a straightforward story with constant hints to things much darker that are never delved into or touched on again. For example: the nanny’s probable mental issues, strange behavior from the older child, the mother’s ethnicity, the nanny’s super sketchy history. It all feels part of a larger, stranger, more interesting story that we NEVER hear. At the 90% mark is when we really meet the lead police investigator into the crime and it’s for ONE chapter.

Spoiler comments aren’t even necessary. At the end of the day it was a promising concept that couldn’t deliver.

What I gave it: 2 stars

What I would pair it with: One of the white Bordeauxs from TJ

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