DRUNK REVIEW: We Regret to Inform You by Ariel Kaplan

we regret to inform you

We Regret to Inform You by Ariel Caplan

Review by ya girl linz


Synopsis

Mischa Abramavicius is a walking, talking, top-scoring, perfectly well-rounded college application in human form. So when she’s rejected not only by the Ivies, but her loathsome safety school, she is shocked and devastated. All the sacrifices her mother made to send her to prep school, the late nights cramming for tests, the blatantly resume-padding extracurriculars (read: Students for Sober Driving) … all that for nothing.

As Mischa grapples with the prospect of an increasingly uncertain future, she questions how this could have happened in the first place. Is it possible that her transcript was hacked? With the help of her best friend and sometimes crush, Nate, and a group of eccentric techies known as “The Ophelia Syndicate,” Mischa launches an investigation that will shake the quiet community of Blanchard Prep to its stately brick foundations.

Synopsis from Goodreads


WHAT IT’S ABOUT: Mischa Abramavicius is a walking, talking, top-scoring, perfectly well-rounded college application in human form. So when she’s rejected not only by the Ivies, but her loathsome safety school, she is shocked and devastated. All the sacrifices her mother made to send her to prep school, the late nights cramming for tests, the blatantly resume-padding extracurriculars (read: Students for Sober Driving) … all that for nothing.

As Mischa grapples with the prospect of an increasingly uncertain future, she questions how this could have happened in the first place. Is it possible that her transcript was hacked? With the help of her best friend and sometimes crush, Nate, and a group of eccentric techies known as “The Ophelia Syndicate,” Mischa launches an investigation that will shake the quiet community of Blanchard Prep to its stately brick foundations.

WHAT I DRANK: Went to an impromptu happy hout w frens. Drank all the white wine and halff the rose. OMG OUR SERVER WAS SMAZING AND SPLIT OUR CHECKS PERF.

THOUGHTS:

  • Part YA coming of age event, part mystery, all heartburn inducing.
    • Like the main character Misha, i too went to privaye school in dc on fin aid and lived in a constant mode of anxiety stress. (I still have fear sweats from the song Country roads, bc a teacher would give us the duratin if it to finish quizzes) The fucking PTSD i experienced reading this book jesus mary, esp when she gets the last rejection letter. So In case youre wondering, Kaplan portrays the high scool competitive ness and stress of college admissions to a t, the portrayal of $$$ disparity in that envronment is PERF, and the voices of the students are on point.
    • All that being said, HOW DO STUDENTS ST AN ELITE HIGH SCOOL W TUITION NOT HAVE UNIFORMS. That i have to call bullshit on.
  • didn’t love the development of rhe romantic relationship, loved the development of the female friendsips in the Ophelia group (althouggh mishas first femsle friend seems like a garbage person, so work past id)
  • the mystery part f the story i completley bought, and i liked the resolution — we don’t always get the endings we want and we live w it. The ending for the yA part left me VERY anxious and unhappy, so i think yhat speaks to how well the author writes these characters that i felt so invested.

Overall, it had some issues – the skillset of the ophelia girls seemed extra, i wish some of the secondary chara ters had more development, really did NOT love the love story development(or the love interest tbh hes kind of a bidoof). But it was a great authentic potrayal of my kinda high scool and rhe college admissions process.

WHAT I GAVE IT: 3.5 stars

WHAT I PAIR IT W: XANAX. Only half joking. Dirty martini, the drink of WASPs

FBGM,

linz

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